Guwahati, February 2025 – Assam Chief Minister Himanta Biswa Sarma has once again rocked the political landscape by asking the most logical question of our times: Is the Assam Congress secretly controlled by foreign forces, particularly the shadowy ‘George Soros ecosystem’?

This revelation has stunned political analysts, Assam Congress leaders, and—most notably—George Soros himself, who, upon hearing the news, reportedly asked, “Wait… what’s an Assam?”

Foreign Conspiracy, or Just Political Theater?

According to Sarma, Assam Congress’s latest decision—presumably something about opposing the BJP (which is literally its job)—could not possibly be an independent political choice.

“This is not normal,” he declared, staring intensely into the cameras. “Why would Congress make a decision in Assam without first checking with me? The only explanation is a global conspiracy.”

To support his theory, Sarma provided zero evidence but a lot of confidence, which, in Indian politics, is usually more than enough.

George Soros, The Ultimate Villain

For those unfamiliar, George Soros is an elderly billionaire who funds various liberal causes worldwide and, apparently, has nothing better to do than plot against the BJP in Assam—a state he may or may not have even heard of.

While Soros’s global influence is widely debated, experts agree that if he really were running the Assam Congress, the party would likely have a better social media strategy and fewer internal power struggles.

Meanwhile, conspiracy theorists have fully embraced the narrative, with one WhatsApp forward claiming:

“First Soros funded NGOs, then he crashed the economy, now he’s personally selecting Congress candidates in Jorhat. Wake up, India!”

Congress Reacts: “We Barely Have Power in Assam, Forget Global Support”

Assam Congress leaders were quick to respond, mostly by laughing uncontrollably.

“We can barely organize our own press conferences,” admitted one Congress worker. “If there’s an international mastermind funding us, could they at least pay for better microphones?”

The state Congress president added, “We wish we had global funding. Right now, the only ‘foreign power’ influencing our decisions is NRI uncles donating during wedding season.”

Experts Predict More ‘Foreign Hand’ Allegations

Political analysts believe this is just the beginning, and that the ‘foreign hand’ argument will be applied to everything going forward.

Future headlines could include:

  • “Fuel Prices Rise Due to Secret London Plot, Says BJP”
  • “Soros Behind Poor IPL Performance of Delhi Capitals”
  • “Tomatoes Cost More? Blame CIA, Says Insider”

For now, as Assam politics heats up, one thing is clear—every local decision must now be examined for global interference, because why accept accountability when you can just blame George Soros?